weeee............

ewe.... why is it i feel like i'm depriving myself into something that i know from the start is very important for me...?!!! maybe because i know i can't have it, though it's hard but i still have to accept it so that it will be easy for me go on with the things along the way... to be honest i think i'm hurting right now though i don't have to be but i can't help it and it's driving me cra..............zy...!

hahaha...

well... i just don't know or rather let's say i don't know how to say it.... hhmmm... well it's not that i still have this stupid feelings of mine for him it's just that i just can't understand why everytime i'm near him i felt like nervous and i don't know why... should i felt bad if ever this feelings for him comes back...?!!! and if ever, i don't know maybe i can't accept and i won't allow myself to let it happen because for me it will make things worst though i dont know why...