gosh...!!

it's been so long but still i can remember everything... the way when you annoy me but makes me feel so safe when you're just around or beside me... i never thought we would be apart (as if naging tayo or meron..?!), but now it's just been way too long since that maybe the incident?... i really want to hear you voice again, you and i talking to each other in a smooth way, miss the way you make me smile... i don't know but for me i know maybe having my life with you would not be perfect but that's life and there's nothing i can do about it... the way i felt for you before was still here until now... i thought after you've hurt me would fade you away from my mind and of course in my heart but i was wrong, very wrong... i sometimes wake up each day dreaming of you and i together. i will never forget you and i also hope you do and all that i am will always be the same... i'm here right now all alone lying here in sorrow, i longed to hold and talk to you... i just realize that i was trying to replace you since i've made that decision (and it's because of you...!) when you'd hurt me so much... it's not that no one can make me laugh and smile like the way you do but at some point in my life you made me so happy and i don't know when was that... maybe no one can ever take your special place here in my heart... i feel that my heart was smashed into peices and left me crying every night to sleep with a pain in my heart of how you've hurt me... i know you don't realize what you have just done to me 'cause i know you're too dumb to admit it... i was soooo stupid of allowing myself to fall for you and having this mistake would never bring me back the things i used to do... i know i'm not that perfect, but before i used to think that i don't want to give you up... i've waited too long just to be with you but i guessed it would never happen... i used to think that you know that i like you a lot, but that was before... but i guess i need to vent and let you know how i feel to ease the pain i had inside and please don't take my venting in the wrong way because that would just make me even more imperfect than i already am...